[ He feels awful about all of this. He'd been so useless the whole night, the only person he'd helped was Hizen and even that didn't feel like enough. How useless was he that he couldn't protect the people he cared about? He shut down in the panic and Karasu took over because he couldn't handle it.

And now Ryouma is acting like this isn't a big deal. It's taking all of his strength to keep the tears at bay. He's so tired and exhausted and stretched thin. The sake burns worse than the tears stinging his eyes and he likes it that way. ]

Yer gonna get yerself killed, ya idiot! Then where's that gonna leave me, huh?! I jus' get t' see ya again an' then yer gone! [ Where the fuck is this anger coming from? It surprises even him with the intensity. He doesn't have the excuse of being drunk for his tears. ] Don't be so fuckin' reckless!

[ And then weaker as he wipes at his eyes in shame. ]

...Don't fuckin' leave me again.